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Daniel Fosselman

Stages

Gaining insight into your own life is never easy. Sometimes, it’s uncomfortable to look in the mirror and truly recognize where you stand. It’s natural to have big, ambitious goals, but it’s essential to acknowledge that there are likely smaller milestones you need to reach on the way to your grand vision. Think of these milestones as checkpoints. The strategies that will help you reach the first checkpoint might look different from those needed to reach the next one. When it comes to making lasting changes, one of the most important principles is to limit the number of changes you attempt at a time. By limit, I mean focus on just one or two areas that you want to improve. Be realistic about what you can accomplish in the next year—setting goals that are within your reach is key to maintaining momentum.


The Search for the Perfect

It’s a common question: What’s the best workout or diet for me? While I, or anyone else for that matter, can’t give you a precise answer that covers every individual detail, I do know how to improve your diet or exercise routine based on your goals. There’s a vast difference between tailoring a program for someone at an elite level and what works best for someone just starting out. If you’re new to fitness or healthy eating, don’t expect to follow the same program as a top performer. Start with something that suits your current level and build from there.


Simplifying Goals for Lasting Change

When it comes to behavior modification, sometimes the key is to make your goal simpler. Behavioral psychology is essential when it comes to creating sustainable health changes over time. While economics teaches us to make the most rational choice, it’s important to recognize that sometimes the most rational choice isn’t the one we can stick with. Take personal finance as an example: Dave Ramsey's "debt snowball" method encourages paying off your smallest debt first, even if it has a lower interest rate. The idea is that the confidence gained from small victories helps you tackle larger challenges in the future. This principle can be applied to health and wellness too—small, incremental changes lead to lasting transformation.


Overcoming Learned Helplessness

One of the biggest obstacles people face when trying to improve their lives is learned helplessness. This phenomenon was first discovered in dogs but applies to humans as well. When we face enough adversity, we begin to feel like we have no control over our circumstances. Eventually, we may stop trying altogether. The more we experience setbacks, the more we’re tempted to give up. However, it’s important to remember that setbacks are a natural part of life. We all experience difficult times, but those challenges don’t define our ability to create positive change.

Making small, sustainable changes that positively impact your health can help retrain your mind to believe that you do have control over your situation. The most important question I ask when offering advice to someone is this: Are you going to do it?


Setting Realistic Goals

It’s unrealistic to expect dramatic results without laying the proper foundation. For example, if your goal is to run a marathon but you can only run a mile, it’s unwise to try running 26.2 miles in a week. Instead, focus on building your endurance gradually. Your long runs should initially focus on reaching a 3-mile goal, not an entire marathon. By setting smaller, achievable progress goals, you’re more likely to succeed in the long term.


Practical, Actionable Goals

When it comes to improving areas of your life like fitness, relationships, or nutrition, it’s important to focus on the basics. For instance, if your relationship is struggling, don’t aim for a perfect marriage overnight. Instead, focus on dating your spouse and reconnecting on a regular basis. If your goal is better nutrition, you don’t need to open a local farm or become a Michelin-star chef. Start with simple, healthy meals that you can make in 20 minutes. Learn to use a crockpot or follow an easy recipe. If strength is your goal, focus on consistent workouts and building your strength incrementally. And if sleep is your priority, then focus on creating a consistent bedtime routine that works for you—not idealizing a perfect sleep schedule that may not fit with your current life.


Focus on Habits, Not Programs

The most effective way to make lasting change is by focusing on building habits that align with your goals. Stop chasing programs or advice that are not suited to your current situation. The key is consistency—small, manageable steps that, over time, create lasting change. Stick to what works for you, and be patient with the process.

Remember, progress is made one step at a time. By setting realistic goals, focusing on habits, and allowing yourself to grow slowly but steadily, you can create lasting change that will improve your life for years to come.



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