I love birthdays. For the past decade I've done a review twice a year and set goals for the year ahead. One lands in December. The other lands around my birthday, July 18, and I start it about two weeks out. Last December the reflection stretched across the whole month, which tells you something about the year I was having. Most of life is swimming. Head down, arms turning over, working hard just to stay afloat. That's not a complaint — it's the job. But you can swim for year

The People in Your Life Are Keeping You Alive Human beings are wired for connection. Underneath most of our frustrations, our political tribalism, our late-night arguments with people we barely know on the internet — there's a more basic craving. We want to feel heard. We want someone to understand our perspective. The trouble is that's an unreasonable expectation. No one will ever fully understand your personal narrative because they haven't lived it. I write more than most

The Solution to Complexity Is Simplicity — Decide What You Want Life is complexity. Science likes to pretend it can isolate one variable, but I've never seen a single-variable experiment in real life. People are different — genetically, phenotypically, contextually — and yet most of us still want the lazy answer: what's going to work for me? Modern evidence-based medicine responds by comparing you to the average. The problem is the average doesn't exist. One of the biggest di

Everything Is a Tool — The Question Is Whether It's Worth Using Almost everything in life traces back to health. Your career, your relationships, your ability to show up for the people you love — none of it works if you're not functional. So when I think about health interventions, I think about them the way you'd think about a toolbox. The more tools you have, and the better you know how to use them, the more efficiently you can get through this project called life. That rai

Medicine Is a Best Guess. Act Accordingly. The honest answer to most clinical questions is: it depends. That's not a cop-out. That's medicine. "Evidence-based medicine" sounds reassuring until you realize what it actually means — it's the intersection of available data, a provider's clinical experience, and the patient's own preferences. The consensus answer might be correct on average and still be wrong for you specifically. The Evidence Problem Nobody Talks About Only about

Incentives Drive Outcomes — In Health Too Charlie Munger famously said: "Show me the incentive and I'll show you the outcome." That principle applies just as much to your health as it does to business or investing. Most people don't struggle with knowledge. They struggle with alignment. Their daily incentives aren't structured to support the behaviors they claim to value. If you want better health, you don't need more information — you need a better incentive system. The Pro

Risk Tolerance vs. Reality in Health A financial advisor told me something recently that stuck with me: "Everyone says they have a moderate risk profile. Their behavior says otherwise." The same thing is true in healthcare. Most people say they want to be healthy, functional, and independent as they age. They say they want low-risk, sustainable solutions. But their daily behavior doesn't match that goal — and that gap is where most health problems are born. The Gap Between Wh

Just Try to Be Less Stupid Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger are two of the most celebrated figures in American business — not because they were born brilliant, but because they spent a lifetime trying to do things the right way. As the architects of Berkshire Hathaway, their advice was refreshingly simple: Don't be stupid. You only need to make a few good decisions per year. It turns out this is equally wise counsel for your health. Stupid Health Behaviors Are Everywhere We

In the first article in this series we discussed a simple framework borrowed from Morgan Housel’s work in The Psychology of Money : Happiness = Expectations – Reality This equation applies to almost every area of life, including health. When expectations are reasonable, people tend to feel satisfied with progress. When expectations are unrealistic, even objectively good outcomes feel like failure. One of the biggest drivers of unrealistic expectations in modern health culture

In The Psychology of Money , Morgan Housel does an excellent job articulating a simple idea: Happiness ≈ Expectations – Reality The gap between what we expect and what actually happens determines a large portion of how satisfied we feel with our lives. The same concept applies to health and the healthcare system. Over the next few articles, I want to explore how expectations vs reality shapes how people perceive their health, their fitness, and ultimately their well-being. T

Walking With People Through Loss There are very few constants in our existence: birth, change, taxes, and death. Everything else is variable. Death is the one appointment none of us can cancel. The finish line looks different for each person, but it is certain for all of us. In that way, death may be the most honest teacher we have. It reminds us that our time is limited. And because it is limited, it matters. Yet in modern society, death is largely removed from daily life or

Parenting is one of the strangest callings in life. It is exhausting, frustrating, ego-crushing…and at the same time, it is one of the greatest privileges you will ever experience. Both things are true. People are a lot like dogs. We are wired differently. Some kids are calm and compliant. Some are intense and explosive. Some are natural pleasers. Others are relentless negotiators. Some require very little guidance. Others require enormous energy, structure, and patience. The

Role Models, Rituals, and the Humbling Education of Parenthood Having children has been fascinating, humbling, and at times brutally exhausting. There’s truth to the cliché: the days are long, but the years are fast. But beyond the fatigue and unpredictability, the greatest gift of parenting has been the education I’ve received from my kids. Children are expressive, opinionated, curious, selfish, imaginative, joyful, and wildly observant. They are not subtle. They want to kn

The Long Drive: Health, Pace, and Preventive Maintenance One of the core principles of this practice is little and often, over the long haul . Real progress almost always happens in small, stepwise advances. A wise patient once told me, “God gives you only the challenges you’re prepared to handle,” and over time I’ve found that to be remarkably true. Life rarely moves in dramatic leaps—it moves in steady miles. I often think of the human body like a car on a long road trip. O

Life Is Better When You Don’t Walk Alone Life is easier when you don’t walk alone. When you fall, someone helps you back up. The problem is that many people feel like they don’t have anyone to walk with—and to be fair, people will let you down. That reality is unavoidable. This is why I’m a strong advocate for what I call distant mentors . There are countless people whose work has shaped the way I think, live, and practice—many of whom I’ll never meet. One advantage of learn

When Goals Stop Working: Recognizing a New Chapter of Life For the past 10 to 15 years, once or twice a year, I’ve sat down and mapped out goals for the coming calendar year. For most of that time, I was remarkably consistent at hitting the majority of them. 2025 was different. It was the year I missed more goals than I completed — and I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on why. The answer, I think, is simple but uncomfortable: I transitioned into a new chapter of life withou

Perspective, Normal, and the Illusion of “Compared to What?” One of the most common—and quietly corrosive—questions people wrestle with is: Compared to what? Compared to who? Compared to where I “should” be by now? Broadening perspective is one of the most powerful—and humbling—things we can do in life. Many of us walk around with the quiet belief that we don’t have enough, aren’t good enough, or should be further along. And the uncomfortable truth is this: all of that might

Stress Management, the Mirror, and the Two Selves When we talk about stress management, the concept only really works if we accept one simple truth: we are always two people —our present self and our future self . These two versions of us are often competing. What brings pleasure to the present self can compromise the future. What brings long-term joy to the future self often feels uncomfortable—or inconvenient—right now. Stress often arises from this tension. The Mirror The

The antidote to sickness is health. The antidote to weakness is strength. The antidote to being poor is creating wealth. The antidote to loneliness is meaningful relationships. And the antidote to ignorance is knowledge. Life becomes far easier when we operate from a position of strength. Yet I often see people trying to be generous before they have anything to give. It’s like donating to charity with a maxed-out credit card. Whether we’re offering time, money, energy, or

Riding the wave is the art of living. Life is the wave—powerful, unpredictable, often indifferent to your plans. God hands you a surfboard. That’s it. The more desperately you try to balance, the quicker you fall. The more you try to fight the wave, the more you waste unnecessary energy. Never try to fight or control the wave. The bigger the wave, the greater the thrill… or the harder the crash. When you learn to surf, you don’t start with thirty-footers. You begin with ripp