Become who you are - Friedrich Nietzche
After squaring away the fundamentals of lifestyle medicine and improving our capacity through relationships and financial security there’s an uncomfortable realization that we have a choice. We can continue to stay on the treadmill of repeating the same actions and apply more effort for marginal gains or stop and reflect on what we actually want. The false assumption of the entire hierarchy is that you must lock in the bottom prior to considering the upper levels. There is more risk with this approach, but you should always be considering, exploring and doing things that promote things on a higher level of the hierarchy. The primary question at the level of self-actualization is “are you living your ideal life” or “are you doing what you want to be doing?” If you’re in the medical profession and the thing that brings you joy is patient care, but over the years you’ve drifted towards administration or management you may need to get back to patient care. You may have wanted to pursue something more creative, but you’ve neglected it for years or decades because it wasn’t going to bring financial security. You are passionate about helping a certain population, but you don’t do anything about it because life gets in the way and “you don’t have time.” There should be a time when you are working for something in line with your values.
The sunk cost of a lot of years to work a job that doesn’t bring fulfillment can be depressing. A lot of people stick in a position based on potential. They wait for the next position to increase pay, without thinking if they really want or will be good at the next job. They think if I leave this field it negates years of prior work. The alternative option is to spend more years in misery waiting for a situation to change, when the change is unlikely.
An archetype is a motif or symbol. The prostitute archetype is someone who does something for money that they don’t want to do. Given the stigma around the word prostitute this can be a blunt and disturbing realization that many of us, including myself, have done work that we don’t want to do for money. It’s common and often necessary for many of us. To mitigate this problem I recommend using the barbell method because it’s not often we get a windfall of money that makes us completely financially free.
Step one is to determine your fixed expenses.
Step two is to determine if your take home exceeds your fixed expenses
If so, move to step three
If not, find a way to either reduce expenses or increase your take home
New job with higher pay
Work more
Step three is to determine what you want to do and start doing it in a limited capacity
Volunteer or a part time gig
Step four determine how to generate income off of what you want to be doing
An alternative option is to seek FIRE (financial independence, retire early) and just leave employment and do what you want
Step five when you make more than your fixed expenses from what you want to be doing, stop doing what you don’t want to be doing
Some of our occupations do not put us in a position in which we can retire early. In this scenario it’s imperative to find a way to do something that brings you joy. The absence of joy can lead to depression and a sense of meaninglessness. This can be doing something for 15-30 minutes a week. Have something in your life that brings you meaning or pursue something that brings you peace. Spending a little of your time being generous and serving others without the expectation of return can be deeply fulfilling.
One of the larger issues I come across is people do not know what they want to do. They have not felt fulfilled in any role or job they’ve previously held. This is where it’s important to gather more information and try new things. If you are in a knowledge worker position, try something manual. If you are completely in an analytic field, try something creative. If you’re largely sedentary, try something active. Google search volunteer opportunities locally and just try one. It is hard to try new things, failing and feeling incompetent is uncomfortable. Everyone has to start somewhere. Reading biographies, non-fiction books, listening to podcasts, or speaking with other individuals may give you alternative ideas of things that you can try.
Another potential strategy is getting to the position where you can delegate or cut back your workload. Maybe you love your job, but you’re overwhelmed with the quantity of work. In this scenario getting yourself into a position where you can cut back your hours can greatly improve your quality of life. Seeking coaching or help on being more efficient in the workplace environment can also be freeing. Seeking out health or executive coaching can reinvigorate your passion for the work that you do.
Play and experiment to find and describe what your ideal life looks like. Work on taking the necessary daily steps to making that ideal life your reality.
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